Six Nations Chumps 2009

Very briefly, then, a summary of the numpties of this season's Six Nations:

15. Andrea Masi - for the unique achievement of being sin-binned in the first minute against Ireland for a ridiculously dangerous high tackle, easily worthy of a straight red.

14. Paul Sackey - did he actually wake up?

13. Yannick Jauzion - so far off his best against England in particular it was bordering on the embarrassing.

12. Shane Geraghty - for taking out an Italian in the air and being sin-binned within 2 minutes of coming on as a replacement.

11. Simon Webster - for knocking himself out and then vomiting on the pitch against Wales.

10. Andy Goode - for being fat, slow and for not tackling. And for not being able to kick - a fatal flaw for a kicking fly half.

9. Mauro Bergamasco - not his fault, but we all know why he's in this list. Danny Care was a close second.

1. Geoff Cross - for taking Lee Byrne out in the air and then receiving a yellow card whilst being stretchered off unconscious.

2. Matthew Rees - for failing to hit a barn door with a banjo against Ireland.

3. Phil Vickery - exactly how many times does a referee have to say "let go of the ball number 3"?

4. Jason White - for not being anywhere near the standard required for an international lock.

5. Luke Charteris - for having all the physical presence of an overgrown runner bean.

6. James Haskell - for an idiotic trip against Italy and for wearing white boots.

7. Sebastian Chabal - playing him at openside was almost as mad as playing Bergamasco at scrum half.

8. Andy Powell - post-Scotland was revealed as a one trick pony - and even that trick wasn't very impressive.