SWB

A good win for the British & Irish Lions tonight against Natal, marred only by the news this week that Stephen Ferris and Leigh ½p have had their respective tours cut short by injury.

I feel for both players, naturally, but the news about ½p triggered the somewhat lateral thought that he is one of a group of players, a group that includes, for instance:

Danny Cipriani; Stephen Larkham; David Humphreys; Matt Giteau; Berrick Barnes; Hal Luscombe; Simon Webster.

In the words of the great Rolf Harris - "can you tell what it is yet?"

I am referring, of course to the SWBs which, for the uninitiated, stands for SCRUMCAP WEARING BACKS.

Why backs feel the need to wear scrumcaps simply escapes me. Such headgear really offers protection only against developing the 'Rowntree Ear' and therefore should be the preserve of the tight 5 forwards and, at a push, the number 8 - although I must say that when I've worn one I've found it to be uncomfortable, hot and distracting.

As an evil necessity to maintain the baby-faced beauty of certain forwards, the scrumcap is just about acceptable. As a fashion accessory to match the coloured boots of the glory hunters in the backline, it is most certainly not.

Sorry Mr. ½p, whilst I feel sorry for your predicament, if you and all your SWB brethren want my respect (which I'm sure you do) and that of your forwards there's really only one answer...

...ditch the headgear.